cvpp: emergency: victim response


			Victim Response COMMON EMOTIONAL REACTIONS emotional shock disbelief powerlessness/vulnerability helplessness loss of control over his/her life shame fear of being alone fear of retaliation by the offender fear of being around men experience breach of trust fear that you are a bad judge of character; attract the wrong guys anxiety feel afraid you’ll see him or do see him everywhere you go embarrassment global fears fear of being "caged in" irritation with other people's trivia feel extreme calm or paranoid fear of possible retaliation total or partial denial/want to forget or escape shame and self blame fear of being blamed/judged fear of not being believed guilt depression grief/intense sadness feeling constantly tired/having less energy fear of pregnancy or VD/HIV fear of being touched fear of sexual intimacy general disorientation feeling of emptiness confusion fear of telling family/friend/boyfriend flashbacks fear of being dirty fear of "going crazy" feeling overwhelmed possible concern for perpetrator if the survivor knew the assailant COMMON PHYSICAL REACTIONS sleeplessness lack of energy hysteria extremely calm appearance muscular tension nausea loss of appetite/eat everything in sight overeating nightmares bedwetting physical pain shortness of breath panic attacks psychosomatic symptoms numerous showers/baths disorientation lack of concentration excessive movement excessive lethargy difficulties with sensuality difficulties with touching difficulties with sexuality may have a greater sexual interest than beyond which you would normally have, showing that you can again maintain control in consenting to sex. REACTIONS OF MALE RAPE VICTIM (similar to the above reactions mentioned for female victims) stressful reporting is difficult lifestyle is disrupted mixed emotions disbelief surprise confusion anger/fear intense shame and degradation anger at having been raped fantasized or planned retaliation against assailants fear of others projecting a negative sexual orientation feeling that you are somehow weak and somehow less than a man fear of being judged by police and other authorities RAPE TRAUMA SYNDROME If you were sexually assaulted, you have been traumatized; physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Rape survivors experience several stages of recovery and adjustment, which is known as Rape Trauma Syndrome. These symptoms are very common, so even if your emotions feel uncontrollable, know that your experience is completely normal for someone that has survived an ordeal like yours. There is no timetable for healing from sexual assault, so allow yourself as much tome as it takes and respect your needs at each stage of healing. Every woman goes through the healing process at her own pace. Stage I Immediately after the assault, you may experience the following feelings: Emotional shock: I feel so numb Why can’t I cry? Disbelief: Did this really happen to me? Shame: I feel so dirty. Guilt: If only I had… Anger: I want to kill him. Stage II Time has passed and you may be returning to your regular routines and feeling as though you should be over the assault by now. You may experience some of these feelings at this time. Depression: I feel so tired and hopeless. Powerlessness: Will I ever have control again? Re-triggering: I keep having flashbacks and nightmares. Anxiety: I’m a nervous wreck. I can’t sleep, I feel nauseous, and I am having trouble breathing. Stage III You begin to acknowledge your feelings and learn what you need to resolve the assault. You regain control and power and begin functioning again as you did before you were assaulted, or at an even higher level. Note: you may have feelings that occur in one or more of these stages. Also a traumatic event can retrigger your emotions and you may fall back to a lower stage; it will be easier to reach the next stage than previously. TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF Some things you can do to help yourself: 1. Accept that you have been through a very traumatic event and it will take a long time to heal; be patient with yourself and give yourself a lot of time. 2. Express your feelings in writing, by keeping a journal of your healing process. It can be very therapeutic to go back and look at it to see how far you’ve come. 3. Get counseling, and/or join a support group with other survivors. 4. Talk about the assault with people who are supportive and nurturing. 5. Find supportive people and relationships where you can get lots of hugs and feel loved. 6. Use physical exercise as a method to release anger and stress: ride your bike, go for a walk, or take a run. 7. Spend time in nature. 8. Go places with people instead of just staying home and crying. 9. Read spiritual books, seek your higher power, and pray for comfort. 10. Don’t blame yourself, no matter what society thinks. 11. Seek justice: Report the incident to the police, and do it right away. Reporting the assault can be very empowering and allow you to regain control of your life. 12. Reclaim your power and control by taking a self defense class.